fast break, break fast.

"they're keeping us in suspicion". That's what my mom said as a detective show we were watching breaked for a commercial.

i've managed to lose one of my favorite cds. (Iron and Wine...The Creek Drank the Cradle)
I can count the number of cds I've ever lost on one hand:

Moulin Rouge Soundtrack
Spiderman Soundtrack
Celin Dion (Christmas album)
and now, Iron and Wine sadly makes the list.

I don't feel like it's time to decorate for Christmas.
I don't feel like I should only have a year left in school. What have I learned?

I'm so sick of wrtiting papers.
This year has been one paper after the other and I hate it. Why am I an English major again? I could read all day...but when it comes to scholarly writing...I could vomit....literally...I think it makes me sick. Maybe that's a bit overdramatic...maybe not.
honestly...i hate writing papers.
i've worried about them constantly all year long.
still haven't heard anything back about the english department job. don't think i will.

oh.
Do you ever get one of those haircuts and it makes your stomach turn?
yeah...i have one.
It's so short.
I feel like a boy.
What makes it worse it that I actually liked my hair and merely wanted a trim...but things didn't turn out so great.
I've learned that hairdressers in general are a touchy subject.
Over the summer I woke up one morning and knew that something had to be done with my hair. It was driving me crazy. It was long and stringy and just unbearable.
So, first off, I went to the beauty school where one of my friends works to see is she could cut it. Nope, she was out with the other stundents watching a tutorial or something like that. Okay. Next, I went to a girl who does a really good job, but isn't always the nicest person in the world. She couldn't fit me into her schedule. I was desperate. Something had to be done. Then! I thought of my cousin. I had completely forgot that she does hair. So I went to Great Clips where she works and...of course...she wasn't working that day. The lady behind the counter told me I could come back tomorrow when she was working or she could do it for me. I almost walked out the door...then turned around and told her to go for it. She did an amazing job. She took off seven inches and I loved it. I told her that I didn't really care what it looked like....just to get rid of all of it. And she did. And I liked it.....best hair cut ever. I even got hit on at burger king afterwards. I felt like a new woman.
But...hair grows.
so....went back to great clips...no sign of the lady but my cousin was there. What was I supposed to tell her?
no, I don't want you to cut my hair.
ugh.
why didn't a call beforehand?
such an ugly situation.
she's only been out of beauty school now for several months.
I could tell she was scared when I sat down in the chair.
I was scared too.
She tried....but it just looked bad.
I wanted it to look good....but it just looked awful.
So, I called my mom and she said that I could stop by and see a hairdresser at home....mom said she would shape it up for me.
Oh, she shaped it up all right.
Right to the top of my head.
One side is shorter than the other....i feel violated.
bad hair just makes everything else bad.
bluh.
thank God hair grows.
My mom told me to take my vitamins and it might grow faster.
she's always looking for an excuse to tell me to take my vitamins.

on a totally different note: I ate way too much food for thanksgiving.
after the third potluck I felt like I was building consumption stamina...not a good thing.
I'll be glad to be back on a regular eating routine.